Healo, Valentine!

Compression band on left, Spanx variant next, and the wearer farthest right.

As I round the corner of the month mark post surgery, I continue to ponder the evolving nature of my healing and recovery. Even knowing that it is not a linear journey, at least not in any predictable kind of way, I am still struck buy the level of presence and attention it demands to keep up with the changes. It’s important to me to maintain this kind of noticing, because sometimes the changes are subtle, but still worth noting, because they all count. Standing a little straighter, walking a little further, all good.

I like to say that there are no baby steps, they are all steps that matter. I mentioned this to someone who suggested that perhaps they are all baby steps, because babies are so cute when they start walking and all the steps are deliberate. I love this turnaround as it exemplifies how essential it is for us each to choose the perspective that makes most sense and speaks loudest to support our most positive direction.

I am on day 14 of the compression wear options. I ordered some shape wear to help with this job (Spanx variant). It took Amazon three tries to get it right. First one was lost in transit, second one arrived in a size 2XL, and although this may have been more comfortable, I really need the appropriate medium size to do the job, and the third, charmed one hit our back door last night. It’s definitely less bulky than the compression band, and I think more effective overall, now that I’ve figured out that a tank top underneath makes it more bearable. Happy that starting tomorrow I go to 12 hours a day, instead of the 24/7 of the past 2 weeks.

I’ve been able to walk the dogs a couple of miles a day, which is a HUGE boon for everyone, and means that it’s easier to sleep on those days, too. I desperately miss Zumba, Orange Theory, skiing, anything more rigorous, and hopefully when I see the surgeon on the 28th will be cleared to start. We’ll see.

I’m also conscious (and self conscious) of the changes in my body that I clearly authorized, but failed to conceive of the full extent of beforehand. I think that eventually it will be a really good thing, but this in betweeny business is tricky. It’s a balance between paying attention, and NOT paying attention, as it continues to settle out. Mental stamina is as much a thing as the physical vicissitudes.

I continue to try to practice patience with this whole process- with mixed success. I’m grateful that I feel good, have a solid appetite and have good concentration to work and write, and sing, and I am in awe of what the human body can do (including mine). And I so deeply appreciate the support in its many forms (beside the Spanx) including texts, cards, meals, flowers, calls and thoughts, all of which contribute to buoying my spirits, and make me smile. (And ok, yes, sometimes makes me teary appreciative).

So here’s to you, all my (funny) Valentines, and the serious ones, too. Thank you for the proof that connection heals, and makes us all better. With love…Meg